So It’s my first week of working entirely for myself and it’s been amazing! It’s also been a bit of a mental roller coaster. Now maybe you are asking yourself why? Isn’t it just the best ever?! I mean what’s roller coaster-y about that?
Change my friend. Change is! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again even good change comes with anxiety and fear.
This week has been wonderful. I mean I can’t tell you how thankful and lucky I feel to be able to do this work and do it on my own terms. I am so grateful to get to spend more time with my family, take my kids to school, have morning coffee with my husband and generally not be rushing around everywhere all the time. It’s such incredible freedom. Friends, I started my morning by taking the dog for a nice long walk. what?! Who am I?!
On the flip side, I also have been feeling some fear and anxiety too. Part is coming from wanting to make sure I can help support my family and that I am fully relying on my skills and self to do it. The other part is from shedding the skin of who I knew myself to be.
We all have things we identify as: parent, wife, designer, co-worker, stress eater, exhausted. You get the picture and for the last decade of my life I have identified as a person who drives a long commute to work, has a stressful job that was SUPER busy all the time. I worked with friends who I loved and laughed with. I juggled kids, family and trying to start a business. I was exhausted most of the time (okay ALL the time). Also, Time… she was not a friend of mine. There was never enough or never enough in the right spots or someone else dictated how I spent my time.
Now though, everything has changed. Yes, for the better in so many ways! I am in control of my time. I am in control of when and how I work. I get to spend the time I want with my family! I get to do work I love on my terms.
But also my identity has and is changing. I do not have to check email all the time. I can go for a walk if I want to. I do have time! I don’t get to joke with my co-workers but I can connect with my friends in new ways that aren’t based on us just being stressed together. I am shifting how I see myself and my old brain habits have to catch up ( Yes, I have phantom “I need to check my work email syndrome” and “I’m going to be late for work.”) and I have to remind myself that it’s okay to let myself find my new identity. It’s okay to let the journey help me find my new normal.
Anytime you make a change you are going to feel discomfort because change takes you out of your comfort zone. Even if your comfort zone is shitty and change is taking you where you want to be, it will be uncomfortable but don’t let it stop you from doing the thing that is right for you! It is so worth it when you get through the discomfort and find yourself standing in our dream life.
I am living my dream right now and I wouldn’t trade any part of the journey it took me to get here! So if you are working on a change, if you have a vision, keep taking those little steps to get there. Keep going through discomfort, it is worth it when you get to your goal!
PS Did you know your business identity can change over time too? I do strategy sessions with all my branding clients to nail down what they do, who they do it for, what their brand words are and how to get their message out in the world. Oh and give them a kick-ass brand to do it with! If you are ready for a re-brand or maybe your first real brand then head on over to my Work With Me page and let’s do this!